Google Buzz is a real time social network that is being automatically added to ALL Google Mail accounts over the next few days.

Bullying UK is concerned that younger users may not be aware of the privacy implications of Google Buzz.

Buzz is a lot like Facebook or Twitter, people can become your friend and you can become theirs, you have a Google Profile that many people would have created years ago but may have forgotten about, leaving the information "public". This includes photographs, Twitter, Facebook and even news stories you have shared..... all open to the world.

When Buzz is added onto your Gmail account all that "Profile" information is brought into Buzz and shared with anyone you have made a friends connection with. You may have to reconfirm your Twitter and Flickr address but your Google Reader and Picasa Photos feeds seem to be automatically imported which is a concern to us.

Buzz is Public by Default

Google wants users of Buzz to feed updates into its public Real Time Search Engine, but this presents all sorts of problems for younger users of the service. We would suggest only posting updates on Buzz that are marked as "Private" click the "Public" icon under the update window to change how an update will appear in Buzz.

We think it's great to share information with people you trust, and having control over what you share and when, but please double check what information you are automatically sharing with Google Buzz or Google's services in general.

In Buzz you can click the Connected Sites link to see a list of services Buzz will import from, click EDIT and you can set if that feed will be exposed to the entire world (Including Google Search) or just to the people you confirm as a friend!

You can change what information Google displays on your Google Profile by visiting your Account page, please be careful what information and feeds you share on your Google Profile and set information or feeds private that you would like to hide from the entire world.

Once again, Google Buzz is a public system, unless you specifically set "Private" on updates or feeds all your updates will be viewable and searchable by the entire world!

Stay Safe...and if you would like to see our Buzz updates you can friend us on our profile.

Bullying UK is the UK's leading anti-bullying charity and provides a huge range of advice on cyberbullying and cyber safety. We rely on your donations to continue our work, please give what you can.

Twitter is popular with everyone but due to the very open nature of Twitter younger users should take extra caution. Remember everything you post to Twitter with an open profile can be seen by anyone in the world and is very easy to search for.

We suggest you put your Twitter profile into PRIVATE mode as this will stop the world seeing your updates.

Login at Twitter.com and go to SETTINGS. Scroll to the bottom of the page and click "Protect my tweets". Click save.

If you would like someone to see your update you will have to FOLLOW each other, if another Twitter user follows you they can't see your updates until you follow back. This gives you control over who gets to see what you are up to.

Pictures and other media

As with any internet service be careful what you post on Twitter, it's really easy to post pictures or video onto Twitter but you must take care not to post anything that could embarrass you later or get  you or anyone else into trouble.

Twitter and your location

One of Twitter's more advanced features is being location aware. That means if you turn the feature on people will be able to see where you posted a tweet from, using your exact location!!

We strongly recommend you keep this setting TURNED OFF. Some mobile phone Twitter clients make it easy to turn on or use the location feature, it's usually marked with a RED PIN or a MAP ICON. Stay clear of this feature if you want to remain private.

Twitter spam and nasty virus attacks

Twitter, like any network, suffers from nasty people who want to ruin it for everyone else. They steal accounts and then send messages pretending to be a Twitter user to trick you into clicking a link so they can also steal your account and do the same to your friends.

Follow us @BullyingUK and please make a donation if you found this information useful and would like more Twitter safety articles

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Twitter is the hottest social network around, used by many celebrities to keep in touch with fans and by citizens all over the world to break news stories or just say what they are up to at any given moment.

While Twitter has been great at helping people communicate quickly and in a very open manner, it's not without its problems. Always follow the usual rules of cyber safety and in addition here are some Twitter specific safety tips.

Twitter Safety Tips

• Never give out your real address, or any personal details - Remember on Twitter everything you say can be open to the world;
• Never give out your password - Also be extra careful when you sign into Twitter through other websites. (Some are scams trying to find out your log-in details!);
• Think before you Tweet! -  Anyone can see what you say unless you make your profile private;
• Don't Follow Back people you don't know - This can help protect you against Direct Message spam. You can still talk publicly using @replies;

Go Private

If you don't want the world to see everything you say on Twitter make your profile private, the option is in your settings on Twitter.com. That way only people you follow back will be able to see your updates, your tweets will also be hidden from the public search as well.

Prevent your Twitter account from being hacked or stolen

Sometimes evil people will try to take over Twitter accounts so they can send private messages to a person's followers but there are lots of ways you can guard against it.

Don't click links in Direct Messages unless you were expecting a link from that user. Most hacks happen when you put your Twitter log-in details into a compromised or fake website. Be careful of sites that look like Twitter.com but aren't. Only log-in to Twitter.com if you typed the link in directly or accessed through a link you know is safe (Bookmark).

If a link is not a Bit.ly link be extra careful. Bit.ly is the most popular link shortening service and does a good job at fighting these nasty links.

At the moment dangerous messages look something like this, but they change all the time so be on your guard. I have replaced the address with URL to protect you.

hah. this you? http://URL
wow. look at this http://URL
Whats your IQ http://URL

If you think your account has been hacked change your password immediately. If you can't log-in you can use the password reset tool on the Twitter support site to generate a new random password to your email address.

If you need some help or just want to tune into what we are up to, follow us on Twitter @BullyingUK

Find this advice useful? Make a donation so we can write more advice to help the Twittersphere.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Always keep private things private

Remember there is a risk that if you fall out with friends they may upload things you've told them, or pictures you've sent them to the internet and once that happens anyone can see them.

Unfortunately some adults who use the internet try to make friends with young people. They may pretend to be near your age but they could be much older. They might try to persuade you that if you were really their friend you would do as they ask and pose in revealing clothes. This is called grooming and is an offence in the UK.

Warning

If you EVER come across anything on the internet, whether it's on a social networking website or anywhere else, where people are making suggestions to you that make you feel uncomfortable or upset, please tell your parents or another adult.

CEOP (The Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre) investigates cases of sex abuse and grooming on the internet. Grooming is where people make friends with you and try to involve you in inappropriate activities. In the UK this behaviour is a criminal offence. You, your parents, or anyone else who is concerned, can report incidents by clicking the red button on the top right hand corner of the CEOP website.

Although the police can get information from your computer's hard drive, it's helpful if you don't delete anything you think is dodgy until the police have decided whether they need it as evidence.

Protect your identity

Don't upload anything that could identify you, which shows your home address, school, car registration number or phone number. Pictures can give away a lot of clues without you even realising it!

Don't get yourself into a situation which might embarass you and don't take pictures of other people which might embarass them and get you into trouble.

Like other social networking websites YouTube is not for people under the age of 13.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Bullying, of course, is nothing new. However, the fact that many children and young people now own a mobile phone has given rise to a new form of bullying; one which can take place 24/7 and even intrude into your home or personal space, where you would otherwise be safe from harassment.

Roughly one in seven or 14% of young people have been threatened or harassed by mobile phone - either by someone they know or anonymously. The type of bullying can be anything from name calling or text messages threatening violence, through to images or video clips intended to frighten or intimidate. You may have seen reports on the TV, in a newspaper, or on the Internet, of so-called "happy slapping attacks", where acts of violence against young people or adults are recorded and shared using mobile phones. In some cases, young people can be frightened to go to school in the first place, or frightened to leave or go into the playground because of the messages or images they have received from bullies. The bottom line on mobile phone bullying, however, is that - like any other forms of bullying - it is unacceptable, very often illegal and there are ways to stop it. For good.

How to Combat Mobile Phone Bullying

1. The easiest way - but it's not always that easy - to combat mobile phone bullying is to take all the steps you can to avoid it in the first place. If you witness mobile phone bullying, or are aware of it going on at school or outside, then report it to a teacher or your anti-bullying coordinator. You'd probably like your friends to do the same for you in a similar situation, and standing idly by increases your chances of being the bully's next victim.


2. Never leave your mobile phone unattended and only give your mobile phone number to members of your family, or friends that you trust. It's not uncommon for a former friend, with whom you've fallen out for whatever reason, to become a bully or pass your number on to someone you really wouldn't want to have it.


3. If you call or send text messages or images to other mobile phone users, be respectful in what you say and careful with the images that you send. Whatever you send can be made public or may pass into the possession of bullies very quickly indeed, so do not divulge anything that could be used to be embarrass or intimidate you in the future. This also applies to images or video clips of yourself. Don't be coerced into doing anything stupid that could be recorded on someone else's mobile phone. Tell a trusted adult if someone has taken a photograph or video clip of you against your wishes - even the most innocent image is easily to manipulate into something more sinister - and don't send images to anyone you don't trust.


4. If you do experience mobile phone bullying, either verbally, by text message or by a bully sending you an image of some kind, it is important that you do not attempt to retaliate or even reply at all. Bullies "get their kicks", if you like, from the power and control they exert over others and they seek to confirm that power by provoking you into a response. If you refuse to be provoked and do not respond at all, you deny the bully the sense of satisfaction that he or she is seeking.


5. This does not mean that you should ignore mobile phone bullying completely: quite the contrary. In fact you should never ignore any form of threat or harassment. You should remind yourself that it is the bully, alone, who is at fault - however dearly he or she wants you to believe otherwise. There are numerous strategies and people that you can turn to. You should involve your parents, or one or more trusted adults - relatives, carers, teachers, doctors, etc., are all there to help. You should inform them immediately because (i) they need to be aware of the problem right from the start, and (ii) they can help you to develop your strategies against the bully. Don't think of this as being a "wimp" or a "grass" -- quite the contrary: it often takes greater courage to do something positive about the problem and you are helping to protect others from the same individual by doing so.You may need an adult to speak to your mobile phone provider, your head teacher, or even the police, as part of your strategy.


6. Keep a diary of what is happening to you -- when and how -- and learn how to save the evidence: offending messages, images, etc. - which may be vital when a bully is finally caught and punished.


7. One of the easiest ways of stopping mobile phone bullying, of course, is to change your mobile phone number altogether - a trusted adult can arrange this with your mobile phone provider - but it is also straightforward for a mobile phone provider to trace the identity of anyone sending threatening or abusive text messages. There are any number of competitive mobile phone deals available from many different providers, so even changing mobile phone provider should not be too much hassle.


8. The Education and Inspections Act 2006 grants head teachers the power to regulate the conduct of pupils, even when they are not on school premises, to an extent that is "reasonable", in the eyes of the law. This may include the confiscation of mobile phones known to be used for mobile phone bullying.


9. If all else fails, however, you and your trusted adult(s) may need to contact the local police. Making abusive or threatening phone calls, or sending text messages or images deliberately intended to cause harassment or anxiety is illegal and is punishable by a fine or, in the worst cases, a prison sentence.

If you want to talk to somebody in confidence about your own mobile phone bullying experiences, you can call ChildLine, on 0800 1111, or if you want further practical advice - for young people and their parents - on how to avoid mobile phone bullying, and how to deal with it when it does occur, websites such as Bullying UK, can be valuable sources of information.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

The people who run these websites are not usually checked by the Criminal Records Bureau as they would have to be if they were working with young people in real life, and they're not registered charities. They may also be based abroad rather than in the UK.

Bullying UK has come across many websites which caused us concern. Some pose such risks to the young people using them that they have been reported to the police and social services.

Websites which were risky included:

• A site offering help to teenagers self harming run by a woman who also posted in other places on the internet telling people how to kill themselves
• A self harm website which links to graphic pictures of self inflicted injuries
• Several websites claiming to be charities which were private businesses
• A fun website run by an adult posing as a teenage girl
• A self harm website for young people run by a bogus teacher
• An anti-bullying website asking pupils to part with personal information

There's no reason why any genuine website would need to keep contact with a young person secret from the young person's parents, unless it was run by an organisation to which they might be revealing abuse by their carers.

The same rules apply on websites as they do in chatrooms. Don't give out any personal details like your name, address, phone number or school.

It might be exciting to think you could win a prize by filling in your details on a website but don't do it. Not only might you get a lot of junk emails (spam) but you don't know if your details will be sold to someone else.

If a website says your visit won't be recorded on your home computer then be very wary. Why should it matter who knows that you've been to the site unless you're visiting a site like the NSPCC where you want to tell them that someone has been mistreating you?

Some advice can be dangerous

Be very careful about taking advice from websites. Unless there's a section telling you who runs the site and what their expertise is, they may not have any. Some sites, particularly those with teenage forums, can give dangerous advice.

The people trying to help you out are probably well intentioned, but if you're upset, depressed, having a bad time in a relationship or at school, you need the best help you can get, and that might be face-to-face or from a recognised charity.

Don't take any medical advice from a website, the best people to help you with worries about your health are your parents and family doctor who know you best.

The website owner should always be happy for your parents or carers to know that you're contacting them and should never offer to do anything on your behalf without your parents knowing about it.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

What do you do when things go wrong? Cyber bullying is rife on the internet and most young people will experience it at some time.

Bullying UK gets panic-stricken emails from young people and parents who are upset and angry about abusive and false postings made on these websites.

But there is lots you can do to protect yourself in the first place and to get abusive material removed quickly when you see it. Our new sections on Facebook, Bebo, MySpace and YouTube tell you exactly what to do.

Problems include:

• Stolen identity
• Threats
• Blackmail
• Rumours and gossip
• Abusive Comments
• Nasty pictures

Warning!

If you EVER come across anything on the internet, whether it's on a social networking website or anywhere else, where people are making suggestions to you that make you feel uncomfortable or upset, please tell your parents or another adult.

CEOP (The Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre) investigates cases of sex abuse and grooming on the internet. Grooming is where people make friends with you and try to involve you in inappropriate activities. In the UK this behaviour is a criminal offence. You, your parents, or anyone else who is concerned, can report incidents by clicking the red button on the top right hand corner of the CEOP website.

Although the police can get information from your computer's hard drive, it's helpful if you don't delete anything you think is dodgy until the police have decided whether they need it as evidence.

Stolen identity

Bullying UK gets lots of complaints about stolen identity. This happens when someone either hacks into your account or pretends to be you when they set up a new account.

Try to pick an unusual password and use letters and numbers. Don't use any part of your name or email address and don't use your birth date either because that's easy for people who know you to guess. Don't let anyone see you signing in and if they do, change the password as soon as you can.

Rumours and gossip

The worst thing about social networking websites is that anything nasty posted about you can be seen by lots of people because it's so public and because the bullies make sure they tell everyone where to find the abuse.

Complaints to Bullying UK show that most vicious gossip and rumours are spread by people who were once your best friends so it's best to keep secrets to yourself.

Only tell people things if it wouldn't embarrass you if other people found out about them. Posting false and malicious things about people on the internet can be harassment.

Threats

Anyone who makes threats to you on the internet could be committing a criminal offence. It's against the law in the UK to use the phone system - which includes the internet - to cause alarm or distress.

It could also be against the 1997 Harassment Act. If threats are made against you then it's essential you tell your parents so that they can alert your school and make a complaint to the police.

If you can't print out the threats use the "print screen" button to take a snapshot of the computer screen and then save that in a word processing package or in your draft email folder. If you're not sure how to do this email Bullying UK and we'll show you how.

Blackmail

Bullying UK has had complaints from young people that new "friends" they have made on the internet have pressured them into taking their clothes off and filming themselves.
Threats have been made that their parents will be told embarassing things if they don't take part.

This is an offence called "grooming" in the UK and men who have been found guilty of "grooming" have been jailed. Remember: everyone you meet on the internet is a stranger and you need to keep personal things personal to you, don't share your secrets with other people and if anyone asks you to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable then don't do it.

If anyone you know on the internet puts pressure on you to do things you don't want to then that's a big danger sign and you need to tell your parents or an adult about it so that their behaviour can be investigated by an organisation like CEOP which looks after the safety of young people in cyber space. Even if all you know about the person is their email address the police can still find out who they are.

Abusive comments

It's tempting to have a go back if someone makes a rude posting on your webspace but don't!! This is called flaming and it just makes the problem worse.

Abusive comments are very upsetting but the best way to deal with them is to get them removed by the website. Bullying UK tells you how to do this in each of the pages set up for each website like Bebo, Facebook, MySpace and YouTube.

Instant messaging

Nasty pictures

It's easy to snap off pictures on a mobile phone and upload them to the internet. Make sure that you have the person's permission to take a picture and that they're happy for thousands of people to see it on the internet.

Don't upset people and then upload their pictures for other people to have a laugh. That could be harassment. Don't digitally alter pictures of people either because what you think is funny may be offensive to other people. Don't let anyone take pictures of you that might embarrass you.

Very important information

If you post abuse about anyone else on the internet, whether it's in places like Bebo, in games forums or message boards, or if you send threats in chatrooms or on IM like MSN, you can be traced by the police without any difficulty.

Every time you visit a website or make a posting, your internet service provider, ie AOL, BT or Virgin, has an electronic note of your activity. Even if you create an anonymous email address like hotmail or yahoo, you can still be traced.

Don't forget

Nothing is secret in cyber space and something you write now might damage your job prospects in future because many employers search the internet before they take people on.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

What is happy slapping?

The assault usually involves a stranger being hit over the head while other members of the gang take photographs/video on their camera phones. The pictures are then circulated by mobile phone or put on the internet. In recent months happy slapping has become an unpleasant and dangerous craze. There have been a number of high profile cases in which attackers have been jailed for killing people in this way.

Where happy slapping attacks have happened in school playgrounds pupils have been afraid to return to school. Anyone who thinks this is just a bit of harmless fun should think about the consequences.

Anyone assaulted in this way should tell their parents who should make a complaint to the police.

Happy slapping is a criminal offence

There are a number of offences involved. The first is assault, the second is harassment if the pictures are shown around and uploaded to the internet and it may also be against telecommunications law.

Bullying UK has had numerous complaints about abusive videos uploaded to websites like YouTube. If you or your friends are the victim of a filmed assault let us know on help@bullying.co.uk and we'll advise you how to get the material removed.

Some schools have already banned mobile phones from being used during the day to prevent pupils sending abusive text messages. We're now hearing of others banning them after happy slapping incidents. It's unfortunate that the bad behaviour of a tiny minority of pupils inconveniences everyone but if head teachers think there is a risk of assaults on the premises then they need to protect pupils and a ban on phones on the premises is probably the best way to do that

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Internet service providers have contact email addresses for complaints about email and this will normally be abuse@hotmail.com , abuse@btinternet.com or whichever system the sender is using. Don't reply to the email or delete it, get your parents to forward the whole thing to the sender's ISP.

What to do if someone sets up a nasty web page about youIf you are a pupil named on an abusive message board or website then let us know and we will contact the website host to try to get it closed down. We have had success doing this in the past.

We recently closed down a series of message boards in the Hertfordshire/north London area where pupils were being identified by name, school and year and others were invited to post abuse about them. These boards have been reported to Hertfordshire Police following complaints to us by parents and pupils.

Among problems we identified were:

• A death threat
• Numerous bogus messages posted in the names of people being targeted
• A boy who lost all his friends as a result of postings made in his name
• Numerous threats of violence
• A girl who tried to kill herself due to abuse
• A teenager on anti-depressants and afraid to go out due to threats

Sending abuse by email or posting it into a web board can be harassment and if this has happened to you then your parents or carers need to make a complaint to the police.

All message boards run by private individuals are hosted by firms and you can often find an address to complain to in the 'help' section of the board. In our experience firms usually act swiftly to shut down the board because allowing abuse to be posted is against their terms and conditions.

Abuse isn't secret

Even if the people posting this abuse do so using a false name, they can still be traced because the firm which hosts the website will keep logs which detail where uploads have been made from. You and your parents can't access this information but the police can.

If you're getting rude comments by instant messenger print them out and give them to your parents. They could contact the police if the messages are threatening or if there are so many of them that they could be considered to be harassment. Change your IM details and only give them to genuine friends.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

When you join a chatroom you'll find people are very friendly but how do you know that John aged 14 who wants to be your new best friend really is a teenager and not Frank aged 57?

People can pretend to be your age You don't know - nobody does - and unfortunately there have been cases where adults have pretended to be teenagers and lured young people into meeting them in dangerous situations. Some of these cases have ended up in court in the UK.

Bullying UK has had experience of young people using the internet who have been persuaded into dangerous situations by adults. This is an offence called 'grooming'.

Internet safety tips:

• Never give out your real name
• Never tell anyone where you go to school
• Only meet someone from a chatroom in a public place with one of your parents or another adult. If they are genuinely who they say they are they will be happy to do this
• Never give out your address or telephone number
• Never agree to meet anyone from a chatroom on your own
• Tell an adult if someone makes inappropriate suggestions to you or makes you feel uncomfortable online

Danger signs

• If the person tries to insist on having your address or phone number
• If the person emails you pictures which make you feel uncomfortable and which you would not want to show to anyone else
• If the person wants to keep their chats with you secret
• If the person tells you that you will get into trouble if you tell an adult what has been going on
• If the person emails you pictures which make you feel uncomfortable and which you would not want to show to anyone else
• If the person wants you to email them pictures of yourself or use a webcam in a way which makes you feel uncomfortable
• If the person shares information with you and tells you not to tell anyone else about it
• If the person wants to meet you and tells you not to let anyone know

Like other social networking websites YouTube is not for people under the age of 13.

Warning!

If you EVER come across anything on the internet, whether it's on a social networking website or anywhere else, where people are making suggestions to you that make you feel uncomfortable or upset, please tell your parents or another adult.

CEOP (The Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre) investigates cases of sex abuse and grooming on the internet. Grooming is where people make friends with you and try to involve you in inappropriate activities. In the UK this behaviour is a criminal offence. You, your parents, or anyone else who is concerned, can report incidents by clicking the red button on the top right hand corner of the CEOP website.

Although the police can get information from your computer's hard drive, it's helpful if you don't delete anything you think is dodgy until the police have decided whether they need it as evidence.

Protect your identity

Don't upload any video that could identify you, which shows your home address, school, car registration number or phone number. Videos can give away a lot of clues without you even realising it!

Nobody from YouTube will ever contact you for account information or for your email address so don't give out bank or any other details.

Privacy

If you're using a shared computer at school, in an internet cafe or library then you'll stay logged on even when you close the browser. This is because YouTube uses persistent cookies. So don't forget to log off when you've finished the session.

You can remove your age from your profile page by going to "My Account", "Channel Settings" and clicking on "Personal Info". Choose "Do not display your age on your public profile" and then click  "Update Channel".

To change your personal info, click the "Channel Info" link. It's best not to fill in any info at all which identifies you because even though you may get very friendly with other YouTubers, if you don't know them in real life you only have their word that they are who they say they are!

"My Channel" is also where you'll find the "Location Info" link but again, DON'T give away any info that would let people identify you or let them steal your ID.

Problems

Comments can make you very angry if they are abusive but don't get involved in a flame war. Often nasty remarks are made to wind you up and even if they're not, sometimes you can take a remark the wrong way, just because of the way it's written.

You don't have to let people comment on your videos. To change the settings for that, go to "My Videos" and click on the "Edit Video" button under the video you want to edit.

Look under "Sharing" where you'll find the button to allow comments. You can choose to either moderate comments by reading them privately before uploading them, or you can let people say what they like. You can also turn comments off altogether. Click on "Update Video Info" to save the changes.

If you want to remove an offensive comment from one of your videos, watch the video and then scroll to "Comments & Responses", find the comment and click on the "Remove" link. You can't reinstate comments if they were removed in error.

Abuse

Flag a video you think is inappropriate and YouTube will take a look at it to see whether it breaks their terms of use.  If it does then they will remove it.

YouTube rules say you can't upload videos with hate content, nudity or graphic violence and if you find one on someone else's space, click on the video to flag it as inappropriate. Submit the form on the next page and report it to YouTube.

You should tell YouTube about videos which show anyone being hurt, attacked or humiliated because they break the rules. YouTube says it has zero tolerance of harassment, stalking, threats or revealing another member's personal information.

Hate speech which targets racial groups, religion, disability, gender, age and sexual orientation is not allowed either.

YouTube has community guidelines and if people break those then YouTube say they will remove the offending video and put a warning strike against the culprit's account. The strikes stay on the account for six months.

Do it a second time within six months and your privilege to upload to YouTube is temporarily disabled. Do it a third time in six months and your account is terminated.

Threats and harassment are likely to mean the account is terminated immediately without warning.

How to report abuse

To report abuse use the YouTube online alert .

This sends you to a page where you are asked to choose whether the problem is harassment, hate speech or privacy and whether you or your child are the target or whether you are complaining on behalf of someone else, like a friend or workmate.

Clicking through to the next section gives you the option to tell YouTube whether someone has released your personal info, stolen your video, is making rude comments, created a video to harass you, is threatening you or has stolen your identity.

Deleting people from your address book

If you fall out with a friend and they cause trouble you can delete them from your address book by going to your account page and clicking the "All Contacts" link in the "Friends and Contacts" section.

Choose which person you want to unfriend and the click on "Remove Contacts". From then on the person won't be on your "Share Video" list.

Closing your account

Click on "My Account" in the top right hand corner and under "Account Settings" click on "Delete Account". Give the reason you're quitting the site and your password and then click "Delete My Account". Log out by clicking the link in the top right hand corner.

Your videos will be removed from the site immediately and the thumbnails will disappear as soon as YouTube is updated.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

The 419 email Originating largely from Nigeria, The Ivory Coast (Cote d'Ivoire), South Africa, Angola, Zimbabwe and Malaysia,  they beg the recipient for help to transfer millions of dollars into a foreign bank account, on the promise of a large share of a non-existent fortune which has been languishing in a foreign bank account for years.

They're called 419 scams by the international community as the fraud is mentioned in section 419 of the Nigerian Criminal Code.

Bullying UK gets a dozen of these emails a day. Some of the senders cheerfully confess to corruption as the way they came by their ill-gotten gains. On one day alone our 'inheritance' totted-up to £25,000,000!!!

The common theme is:

• The untimely and unfortunate death of the money's owner, often in a plane crash, by murder or in a land dispute
• The donor is suffering from a fatal illness
• The donor is someone with a conscience working for a bank, or is a relative of a government minister, a civil servant or a barrister
• You are the only person they trust
• You must keep the transaction secret
• The sender wants your bank account details
• The transaction is 100% risk free

These emails often contain detailed accounts of the sender's address and phone number and add that the person is employed by a large corporation in a bid to gain credibility. Often they have British sounding names.

In other cases the person needing your help is the wife of a murdered government minister, a prince, a chief or the son of a military figure.  Alternatively they may be a barrister or a doctor. They usually have access to cash which they want to transfer abroad and they ask you to be their 'next-of-kin'.

If you're interested in the deal with these new-found and generous adopting relatives, you may be asked to provide bank account details, letterheads and invoices. They insist that you hurry to take advantage of these dubious offers.

The idea is that the money is put through your account and then you get a large percentage of the proceeds.

Of course it has to be secret and the scamsters rely on greed to complete their dodgy deal. You're not going to tell anyone about something you think may be not quite on the right side of the law.

There's nearly always a sob story involved, apart from the unfortunate demise in a plane crash, torture and murder, other email hopefuls have had their land stolen or other reversals of fortune.

Religion also plays a part. Multiple blessings are promised to those foolish enough to go along with the scam.

How it works

Before the transaction can go ahead you are likely to be asked for money to cover various fees - and then for more money to cover unforeseen difficulties.

The reality is that if you part with your bank details your account will be emptied of money.

The senders of these emails use anonymous addresses like hotmail.com, yahoo.com and others. It isn't unusual to have similar emails in the names of different people as the scamsters forget who they are supposed to be.

It's difficult to know how many people have been taken in by these scams, embarrassment may prevent them being reported to the authorities.

Where to report the scamIn the UK, the National Criminal Intelligence Service (NCIS)has taken action on these fraudsters and they are well known to council trading standards officers who issue regular warnings. Many police forces also have warnings about them. The Metropolitan Police have a particularly good account of how they work. www.met.police.uk/fraudalert/419.htm .

The NCIS say that if you receive one of these scam emails, print it out including the header and take it to your local police station, marked for the attention of the Fraud Squad. If you've lost money on the fraud contact the West African Organised Crime Section on 0207 238 8012.

The best claim we have seen with one of these scams is the assurance: "Honesty is the watchword in this transaction".

Lottery scams

If you fall for one of these scams you'll be a loser, not a winner.

Often originating in Spain or Holland, these tell you that you've won a lottery you haven't even entered!. Bullying UK trustees have even received one from Liverpool using a genuine National Lottery logo!

The idea is either to get you to pay some fees up front (which you'll never see again) or for you to ring an expensive phone line where you have to listen to a long message, costing you pounds.

The prize doesn't exist and as with all these scams, if it sounds too good to be true then it is.

Hard luck stories

These pretend to come from parents in Russia or the US who need money to put food on the table or to heat their homes. Sometimes they come from 'students' who need funds to complete their studies.

The aim is the same as other scams, to extract money from kind people who believe they are genuine.

World tragedies like famines, war and tsunamis can also prompt a spate of bogus emails so if you ever receive one saying it's from a charity look the charity up on the Charity Commission website and check that they are doing an appeal and that the donation details are the same as those on the website. Better still, donate to someone like the Red Cross or Oxfam so that you know your money is going to a genuine cause.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Although the police can get information from your computer's hard drive, it's helpful if you don't delete anything you think is dodgy until the police have decided whether they need it as evidence.

Safety tips

Don't post anything on MySpace or in your profile which gives your real name, address, school, phone number or which will allow a stranger to contact you in real life. Make sure you don't ID your friends either!

Don't upload anything that might embarass you at a later date. You might not realise it but things you post on the internet now could come back to cause problems for you later on, for instance when you go for an interview for college or a job.

When you go into a social networking site like MySpace people might approach you to be a friend but remember that no matter how much they tell you about themselves, they are still strangers and they might not be telling you the truth about themselves. There have been cases of men in their forties and older pretending to be teenagers online. This is called grooming and is a criminal offence.

If anyone makes you feel uncomfortable or embarassed online then please tell your parents or another adult. If they're doing it to you then they might also be doing it to other young people. It's particularly important NEVER to meet up with anyone you meet online in real life, if anyone suggests that to you and particularly if they suggest you keep it secret that's a real danger sign.

If you have a webcam never be pressured into taking pictures of yourself that you wouldn't want other people to see.

Abuse

Don't get into arguments online, this is called flaming and it can get nasty. If you break the MySpace rules then the content is likely to be removed and you might have your membership terminated.

You're not allowed to upload anything which is offensive or racist and which promotes physical harm so don't make threats to anyone. Neither are you allowed to harass people or to encourage other people to harass them. You're not supposed to ask for personal information from anyone under 18 either so if you are under 18 and anyone asks you, for instance, where you go to school, make sure you report them to MySpace.

If you think you can settle a score by spreading rumours and making up false things about an ex-friend then think again because you'll be in trouble if you upload anything which is threatening, abusive or which is defamatory. It's defamatory if you say untrue things about someone which give them a bad reputation they don't deserve. It can also be harassment which is a criminal offence in the UK.

You're not supposed to upload a picture or video of anyone without their permission either.

Bullying UK gets lots of complaints about identity theft and people setting up social networking website accounts in the names of other people, often uploading false and upsetting things about them. Impersonation is against MySpace's terms and conditions.

Remove Friends

You can remove people from your Friend List so they can't add Comments to your Profile page, you can delete Comments on the Profile page and you can delete messages they send via MySpace mail without reading them.

You can also view their profile and click "Block User" so they can't contact you again.

How to get abuse removed from MySpace

How to delete a MySpace account

Click on "Account Settings" and then on "Cancel Account". The cancel confirmation page then shows and you should click the red button which says "Cancel my Account". You can give a reason or not, it's up to you.

Click "Cancel my Account" again and an email will be sent to the user's email address. When the email arrives, click on the link to finish the process and confirm that you want the account removed.

If the email doesn't arrive have a look in your email spam folder to see if it is there.

If you're a parent and you don't receive the email, remove all the content from your child's profile and in the 'About Me" section type "Remove Profile". You can also set your profile to private so that nobody else can see it.

Parents can also email parentcare@myspace.com

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

There are lots of safety and privacy controls on Facebook so always use them.

Like all social networking websites, Facebook is only as good as the people using it so you might come across things which are upsetting, illegal or offensive in other ways.

If you're under 13 then Facebook's rules say you can't use the site and if you're older, Facebook warns parents they should think about supervision. After all, if you join up then you're inviting total strangers into your home!If you EVER come across anything on the internet, whether it's on a social networking website or anywhere else, where people are making suggestions to you that make you feel uncomfortable or upset, please tell your parents or another adult.CEOP (The Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre) investigates cases of sex abuse and grooming on the internet. Grooming is where people make friends with you and try to involve you in inappropriate activities. In the UK this behaviour is a criminal offence. You, your parents, or anyone else who is concerned, can report incidents by clicking the red button on the top right hand corner of the CEOP website.

Although the police can get information from your computer's hard drive, it's helpful if you don't delete anything you think is dodgy until the police have decided whether they need it as evidence.

Control who sees your profile You can edit your settings from the privacy page which gives you control over what visitors to your profile see and you can also control who can see your details too.

Harassment

If you've got a Facebook account and you're getting unwelcome contact or harassment from people you've fallen out with, tell them to stop.

You can also block people by using the "Block People" box on the My Privacy page. If you block someone they can't see your profile and if they search for you then you are invisible.

You can also control how much people see about you by setting up a "Limited Profile". To do this, go to the "My Privacy Page" after logging on and click on the "Limited Profile Settings" link.

Choose the profile features you want other people to see and what you want to share, like pictures, and click "Save" to store the new settings. You can also add confirmed friends to the limited profile network by listing their names in the limited profile box.

Report trouble

If people don't stop making offensive postings, you can use the "Report" link which is on the Facebook pages to make a complaint. You can also email abuse@facebook.com.

Facebook pledges to investigate the complaint and to remove the content and warn or ban the offender from the site within 24 hours. If you email Facebook you should get a reply within 72 hours telling you what they have done about the problem.

Close your Facebook account

To deactivate your Facebook account go to the "settings" tab on the Account page. That will remove your profile and content and nobody will be able to see your details or search for you. But if you decide to reinstate the account later then the whole lot will be restored, including your friends and photos.

If you're not happy about the way Facebook dealt with your complaint, you can make a complaint to the Independent Safety and Security Examiner in the US (ISSE) http://www.krollisse.com/ . Unfortunately ISSE can't consider the actual abuse you are complaining about and it won't re-adjudicate Facebook's decision if it refuses to remove content.

Inappropriate content and suspicious people should always be reported to Facebook and your parents should complain to CEOP too.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

We've also come across instances where abusive mobile phone text messages have been sent through websites using the names and phone numbers of people who had nothing to do with the message but who were blamed for it.

Problems include

• Silent calls
• Insulting and threatening texts
• Abusive verbal messages
• Stolen identity

Cyberstalking is frightening and illegal and the people who do it are not as anonymous as they think.

Be careful when giving out your telephone number. Mobile phones are relatively inexpensive and if you start getting abusive calls or text messages then it might be better to get another SIM card so that the bullies can't contact you.

Keep a note of the times and dates of abusive messages. Don't reply to them or delete them but tell your parents so that they can make a complaint to the police.

The law

If there are a series of calls or the calls are part of a bigger picture of bullying then this may amount to harassment which is an offence under the 1997 Harassment Act.

Every time a mobile phone is switched on or off it sends a signal to the nearest mast and although the caller may have concealed their number from you, this is information which phone companies will have on their system and it's easy for the police to find out the culprit's phone number.

Making anonymous or abusive phone calls is also a criminal offence under section 43 of the Telecommunications Act 1984.

The actual wording is that a person who:

a) sends, by means of a public telecommunication system, a message or other matter that is grossly offensive or of an indecent, obscene or menacing character: or

b) sends by those means, for the purpose of causing annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety to another, a message that he knows to be false or persistently makes use for that purpose of a public telecommunication system, shall be guilty of an offence and liable on summary conviction to imprisonment for a term not exceeding six months or a fine not exceeding level 5 on the standard scale or both.'

This shows the seriousness of the offences which may be seen as a joke by the perpetrators but which cause a lot of distress.

How to deal with a phone pest

BT recommends that you stay calm and try not to show emotion. Don't give your phone number when you answer a call, just say "hello".

Never give any information about yourself unless you are certain you know the caller. A telephone answering machine can be useful at home, leave it on all the time and then when the person starts speaking, if you know them, you can pick up the phone. A genuine caller will speak first. A malicious caller will probably hang up.

If you get your service from BT and receive a malicious or nuisance call and would like advice, call Freefone 0800 666 700. A recorded message will tell you what to do if you need more help.

You can also call free on 150 for personal advice and information about how BT can help you tackle the problem. The service is available 8am to 6pm, Monday to Saturday. If the problem continues then contact your nearest BT bureau on Freefone 0900 661 441 during office hours. The bureau deals exclusively with malicious and nuisance calls.

BT may suggest tracing future calls or changing your telephone number. Almost all malicious calls can now be traced whether they come from private, public or even mobile phones, anywhere in the country.

A dedicated team of specially-trained BT people will work with the police so it will be helpful to any subsequent prosecution of the malicious caller, if you keep a written record of the calls, making a note of the date, time of day, what was said and whether you heard any background noise.

Staying safe with your phone

Although it's nice to have your mobile phone handy to chat to friends, don't flash it about in public because you risk having it swiped. If there's a lock facility on it choose a secret number so that the keypad is locked when you're not using it. If someone you don't know asks to borrow your phone to make a quick call tell them that it's out of credit and only accepts incoming calls.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Blocking people and deleting friends

If you've fallen out with someone and they're giving you a hard time,it's best to block them so that you don't see their upsetting comments.

To do that, click on the username or photo of the person on your profile and then under their profile photo click the link that says "Block". You can then click on the button that says "Block". You can unblock them using that button too.

However, your profile is still on view to people you have blocked.

If you want to delete a friend because they're not a friend any more, click on the "Home" button on the top menu bar and then click on the "Friends" button on the bottom menu bar. Choose the contact to delete and click on the red cross next to their profile. Then click the "Delete" button.

That not only deletes the friend from your Bebo account but also removes your own details from their account and address list.

Deleting abusive profile comments

Reporting abuse

Sometimes people post offensive things and refuse to remove them so you should complain to Bebo if you have a problem like this. It's easy to do that.

Go to the profile page of the person you want to report and click on "Report Abuse". This button is just below their profile photo. If you want to report a video or photo then click the link "Report Abuse" just below the content.

Bebo doesn't tell the person who has reported them and anyone can complain, the person who has been bullied, a parent, teacher or a youth worker.

Bebo won't get involved in a dispute between you and the other person but they look into all reports of abuse and can warn the other person about their behaviour or in serious cases where someone has broken the rules, they can cancel membership.

How to cancel Bebo membership

It's easy to cancel by clicking on the "Home" tab once you are signed in and then going to "My Account" which is on the bar below the tabs.

At the bottom of the "My Account" page is the link which says "Cancel Your Membership". You have to click the "Yes" button to cancel.

Contact Bebo

If you need to contact Bebo with a query, the address is http://www.bebo.com/ContactUs.jsp . That address goes to a form you can complete and a drop down menu which tells Bebo which department you need.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If the people bullying you are at school with you then your parents need to talk to your class teacher or head of year about what's happening in case trouble spills over at school.

Although schools can take action over bullying on the journey to and from school they will be less keen to do anything about bullying that happens at the weekend or in the holidays.

Stay safe in the street

If you feel worried about running into trouble at home see if you can get friends to come to your home so that you can go out together. Take a different route to the shops and if it's dark stick to well lit streets. You could also get a personal safety alarm. These cost about £6 and you can get them in the home security section of DIY stores like Homebase, Focus and B&Q.

If people shout insults then don't reply, walk away and then make a note of it later. They will be doing this because they know it upsets you and also because they think it makes them look big in front of their friends.

It's very important that you tell your parents or whoever cares for you if you have been threatened or attacked in the street.

The age of criminal responsibility in England and Wales is 10 so if people who are bullying you are older than that your parents could make a complaint to the police. Hitting or kicking you is an assault and calling you names or making rude gestures to you over and over again could be harassment.
It's not easy for the police to know who is telling the truth so if you are bullied like this keep a diary of who says and does what and also who else was there and saw what was going on.

Bystanders have a vital role

Unfortunately young people who witness bullying like this are often afraid to tell the police what they saw in case they get bullied too so it can be helpful if you know the names of adults who have seen this happening to you.

There are now police community support officers and they often help in cases like this by talking to both sides and trying to sort it out before it gets further out of hand.

In serious cases the police will take statements and might recommend that charges are brought against the bully. If the bully admits what they have done the case might not go to court but the bully might get a caution instead which is an official warning.

There are other people who can help apart from the police.

Trouble with neighbours

If there is trouble between families who live in council or housing association homes then the council might arrange mediation to see if the problem can be sorted out.

In serious cases where young people are violent and abusive the police or council can apply for an anti-social behaviour order (ASBO) or their parents could be warned that if they keep misbehaving the family could be made to move out of their rented home.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

On the school bus, try to sit near the driver, or if it's an ordinary bus, by other adults. If you have to walk part of the way, and you're afraid of being ambushed, then vary your route, try to leave home and school a bit later or a bit earlier, or see if you can walk with other people who live near you, even if they're older or younger.

Many streets, shops and businesses now have CCTV so if you're attacked in the street the police may be able to get filmed evidence.

Schools often refuse to take action on bullying if it happens off the premises but they do have the power to punish bullies if the bullying happens on the way to and from school.

How your parents can help

If you're being bullied on the bus your parents or carer should write to the school to make a complaint and they could also make a complaint to the council department that deals with school transport and ask if the bully can have his/her bus pass withdrawn for a week or so in the hope that the inconvenience to them and their parents will mean they behave better.

Your mum and dad or carer could also make a complaint to the bus firm because if there is trouble on the bus which distracts the driver the firm might be pleased to have the chance to complain to the school about it.

If you feel unsafe while walking to school you could get a personal safety alarm. These only cost a few pounds and look like a key ring. The loud noise they make will attract the attention of passers-by and frighten the bully off.

Expensive goodies are tempting to muggers so don't flash your mobile or your MP3 player about, put them in an inside pocket.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you want help with a written project for school/college, you can use any information off the site for background information, but please don't copy it word for word and please credit Bullying UK as the place you got it.
Unfortunately, we cannot give permission for our copyright content to be used on any other websites or in any other electronic media or printed form.

Statistics

There are no official statistics for the number of pupils being bullied at any one time in the UK. The only type of bullying which has to be recorded in the UK is racist bullying.

Neither are there any statistics for the number of young people who kill themselves due to distress over bullying. These figures do not have to be officially recorded but it is believed that around 16-20 pupils in the UK commit suicide every year. Some deaths are recorded at inquests as an 'open verdict' meaning there isn't enough evidence for the coroner to decide exactly what happened.
Carry out a survey Bullying UK carried out The National Bullying Survey 2006 and you can find a copy of the comprehensive results in a pdf on our home page.

If you want to find out the extent of bullying in your school, a survey is a good place to start. Ask your school if you can get together with other pupils to come up with some questions about the things you feel are important at your own school. For instance, you might want to ask if particular areas of school are unsafe.

Questions you can ask

• Have you been bullied in the last year?
• Are you being bullied now?
• Are you being bullied by one person or several people?
  
• Was the bullying name-calling?
• Was the bullying excluding you from friendships?
• Was the bullying violent (hitting, kicking, punching, pushing)?
• Was the bully threatening to harm you?
• Was this bullying because of your colour, race or religion?
• Was the bullying about being gay?
• Are you being bullied out of school?
• Are you being bullied on the internet or by mobile phone?
• Are you being bullied on the way to school
  
• Was the bullying by pupils the same age or by those older or younger?
• Did you tell your parents/carer?
• Did you tell a friend?
• Did you tell a teacher?
• Did you hit back?
  
• Did you stay at home?
  
• Did the bullying stop?
• How many days have you taken off school due to bullying?
• Have you kept a diary about the problem?
  
• If it got better why do you think this was?
• If it got worse, why do you think this was?
• Where did bullying happen?
• Are some areas of school unsafe?
• Where in school is bullying most likely to happen?
• Have you seen anyone else being bullied?
• Have you ever bullied anyone?
• Why did you bully someone?
• Do you know if the school has an anti-bullying policy?
• Do you know what you are supposed to do at school if someone is bullying you?

If you want to publicise your project you could make a prominent display with pupils' pictures, poems and quotes. Perhaps you could put on a play.

If you do a survey and collate the results with the idea of updating your school bullying policy, then think about doing another survey after a year, to see how effective any changes to the policy have been.

Differences between girl and boy bullying

Bullying UK is often asked what are the most common forms of bullying in secondary schools.

Our experience has shown that boys and girls tend to bully in different ways. Teenage girls are more likely to use exclusion from friendships, rumour spreading, gossip and name calling while boys - although they do indulge in these things - are more likely to punch and kick their victims than girls and to use intimidation.

Girls are the main perpetrators of mobile phone abuse and also on the receiving end of most text message abuse and silent calls.

Girls who are good friends often tell each other their big secrets and when they fall out this sometimes means that the ex-friend posts really embarrassing things about the other girl on the internet. This can be very upsetting but anyone who does this can easily be traced by the police because nothing you do on the internet is secret, your digital fingerprints are all over it, even if you create a name using an account like hotmail or yahoo.

Posting nasty stuff on the internet about someone else, or altering photos of them to make them obscene, can be harassment which is against the law. It's also against the law to use the phone system, which includes the internet, to cause alarm or distress.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If the bully has taken your friends away you could have a word with each of your friends individually, at a time when nobody else is around, and just sound them out. You could try to get them talking about something they did at the weekend and then just say that you used to be friends with them and you're not sure why that changed. Tell them that you'd really like their support.

You're probably not the only one being bullied who has to spend break and lunch hour on your own. Keep your eyes open. If you see someone else on their own try to start a conversation, about anything, schoolwork, if you think you know their sister, if you think they might live near you, anything at all.

How to make new friends

To have friends you also need to be a friend and you can do that by trying to be open and friendly with people and asking how they are.

This isn't always easy because sometimes the people you are nice to aren't nice back, but if you just ask someone if they had a nice weekend then it gives them the chance to say something back and then you can try to continue the conversation.

People love talking about themselves so in time you'll find people who like doing that because you'll come across as a good listener and then people will enjoy your company and you'll find you have the same interests as some of these people which is the first step towards real friendship.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

How to solve the problem

The best idea is if a teacher can catch the bullies red-handed. That way, you won't get into bother from anyone for telling tales. It will be clear to everyone what has been going on. Don't be tempted to hit back because you could get hurt or get into trouble.

Bullying includes:

• People calling you names
• Making things up to get you into trouble
• Hitting, pinching, biting, pushing and shoving
• Taking things away from you
• Damaging your belongings
• Stealing your money
• Taking your friends away from you
• Posting insulting messages on the internet or by IM (cyberbullying)
• Spreading rumours
• Threats and intimidation
• Making silent or abusive phone calls
• Sending you offensive phone texts
• Bullies can also frighten you so that you don't want to go to school, so that you pretend to be ill to avoid them

Hitting someone is an assault.

Try to stay in safe areas of the school at break and lunchtime where there are plenty of other people. Bullies don't like witnesses. If you are hurt at school, tell a teacher immediately and ask for it to be written down. Make sure you tell your parents.

Bullying is upsetting

Bullying is very upsetting and if you feel you can't cope, tell your parents and go to see your doctor. Many doctors are very sympathetic about the effects of bullying and yours may be able to write a note for the school explaining the effect that bullying is having on your health.

You could think about judo or martial arts classes so that you are confident you can look after yourself if necessary.

If people are making nasty remarks about you then it may be because they are jealous. Perhaps you're better looking than they are or work harder or perhaps the teachers like you better. One way of dealing with remarks is simply to say ...yeah, whatever, .... each time so that you show them that it isn't having the effect of upsetting you in the way they think.

The bullies will have worked out what buttons to push to make you upset.

They may make remarks about:

• Your weight
• Your looks
• The colour of your hair
• Your family
• Your schoolwork
• If you are popular
• If you work hard
• If you have a disability
• If you are a different religion, colour or culture
• If you wear spectacles or a hearing aid
• If you have dyslexia or dyspraxia
• If you've been off school due to illness

Bullying UK gets emails from pupils who have stopped eating because they've been called fat, or stupid because they have dyslexia. One girl tried to burn her freckles off because of cruel remarks.

The thing all these pupils had in common is that they were perfectly ordinary, nice people who had the misfortune to come up against a very nasty person.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

You might think that it would be a good idea to move to a new school if you're being bullied but the reality is that there is bullying in all schools, although some deal with it better than others.

All the best schools are already full and if you think that you will get preferential treatment to get into a good school because you're being bullied, or because you're staying at home due to bullying, then that isn't the case.

You may end up being allocated to a less popular school and less popular often means poorer exam results and discipline problems.

There are often long waiting lists for the best schools and although your parents can appeal to the local council for a place, there's no guarantee you would get one.

Other things to consider are:

• The new school may be further away and inconvenient and expensive to get to
• The cost of the new uniform
• It may be difficult to settle into a class where everyone already has friends
• The school may use a different exam board so the coursework could be different
• The bullies may have friends at the new school

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Or timid and worried? And how did you look to other people? Were you striding out purposefully with your head up, looking forward, or were you trying to make yourself look insignificant in the hope that the bullies wouldn't spot you?

How to look more confident

Body language tells us a lot about other people. If you're trying not to be noticed and looking at the ground a lot while darting into school it can make you more noticeable. You look defensive and vulnerable.

If you step out boldly you send out a quite different message of confidence, as though you're the sort of person who might answer back if the bully tries a smart remark. You may not be very confident but you'll certainly look it.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Not everyone can be on the team so don't be upset if you're not always chosen. That doesn't mean that you're being bullied, just that the coach needs to pick the strongest side.

But if team mates make fun of you on the pitch or in the changing room, or try to upset you to put you off the game so that you don't want to take part in training sessions, that could be bullying if it keeps happening.

Action you can take

• Tell your parents or carer
• Ask your parents to contact your team coach
• Keep a diary of what happens
• Ask friends on the team to back up what you say

If the problem isn't resolved, your parents should ask the coach or team manager for a copy of the complaints and/or bullying policy.  There is more information on this for your parents in the parents section and for teachers and sports club leaders in the schools section of Bullying UK.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Sometimes, when you're very unhappy, you might want to stay at home to avoid the bullies because you're afraid of what they might do to you.

Staying off school can make things more difficult the problem is that if you start taking days off then you can quickly fall behind with work and that makes life more stressful as well as possibly affecting your exam results and your future.

Unfortunately, taking time off school without being genuinely ill is considered to be an unauthorised absence or truancy and your parents could end up being prosecuted for it.

Luckily, council education departments have people who can help in this situation called education welfare officers or education social workers and they can often make a big difference so that pupils can get back into school quickly and with the support they need.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If people call you names then they might make nasty remarks saying that you are gay, whether you are or not. Rumours and gossip might be spread about you.

You might be picked on in this way because you're quiet, good looking or because you have good friends of the same sex.

What to do about gay bullyingIf you're being bullied in this way you need to tell your parents and report it to a teacher. Keep a diary of the remarks. If this sort of bullying spills over into violence then it should be reported to the police as a hate crime. Many police forces have specialist units to deal with these incidents.

The people who make these remarks are trying to make you lose your temper

so it's best not to respond to the taunts or if you feel you need to, just say, "Whatever".

In many cases the people who are picking on you are projecting their prejudice on to others. They may also hear gay jibes being used at home or by older people who hold outdated attitudes.

What should schools do about gay bullying?

Schools should deal with homophobia as it's called by including it in their bullying policies. In 2003 a survey of 300 schools found that 82 per cent of teachers were aware of gay name calling in their schools and 26 per cent knew of physical incidents.

Some schools are also dealing with the problem by raising it in citizenship lessons, looking at how to tackle prejudice and discrimination.

There are a number of organisations which help pupils with these issues including our friends at Stonewall, Schools Out and the Intercom Trust.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Nobody has the right to call you names or to treat you badly because of your colour, race or religion. It's illegal and it can be stopped. You don't have to be a different colour to suffer racist bullying. You might have come from Romania or the former Yugoslavia.

Neither is racist bullying confined to colour of skin. We've had complaints of non-Welsh and non-Scots children experiencing bullying in those countries. Other complaints have been about traveller children finding life difficult in school.

Racist bullying is the only type of bullying that schools must record.

There is a difference between racial discrimination and racism Racial discrimination means being treated differently to someone else because of your race, perhaps by being told you cannot wear a turban if you are a Sikh, a yarmulka if you are a Jewish boy or hijaab if you are a Pakistani girl.

Racism means you are subjected to abuse and harassment because of your race, colour or beliefs.Bullying UK receives many complaints about racist bullying. If you are being bullied in this way you must tell your parents and ask them to write to your head teacher about it. Keep a diary of who says and does what because that will help the school to see where the bullying is taking place.

The complaints we've had include a girl aged six being told by a classmate that she cannot take the school mouse home because he doesn't like people with brown faces, to more serious incidents involving teenage gangs and weapons, one of which meant a boy was too frightened to return to school.

These complaints have come from all parts of the UK and are not confined to any particular area. Your parents need to make a complaint to the police if the school doesn't sort out racial bullying.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Every year at Bullying UK we support more than 500,000 people, 300,000 of those are young people desperate for advice to help them cope with bullying and get it stopped. We can only be here for them with your help.

We ask you to please make a donation, no matter how small, to help Bullying UK to meet its commitment to help over 300,000 young people a year.

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Why should it cost millions to help only a few thousand young people when we can help hundreds of thousands by working efficiently on the internet.

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Many pupils are being targeted with cyberbullying in their own homes, by phone texts, silent calls, on instant messenger and by abusive websites and forums set up to cause humiliation and embarrassment.

Fortunately, no matter how careful the bully is to cover his/her tracks, there is no hiding place in cyberspace and the police can track their digital fingerprints down to an individual computer or mobile phone. Abusive websites can be shut downBullying UK has a particular interest in cyberbullying and we've closed down a number of abusive websites and internet forums. There are also other hidden dangers on the internet and you need to know how to recognise risky websites which may not be what they seem.

Cyber safety is very important and you'll find information about staying safe on the internet on this website.

Cyber crime

Cyber crime is another issue which is causing concern. Never give anyone information about yourself which identifies you, so never tell them your real name, your address, where you go to school, never give them your phone number and NEVER, EVER arrange to meet them on your own or with a friend. If they ask you not to tell your parents about their contact with you then that's a good reason for wondering what they are up to!!!!

Never tell anyone your bank account details or any passwords. Make sure you change your log-in details regularly. Be cyber savvy!

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Bullying makes people so upset that they often need to see a doctor. They might even try to kill themselves, or they self harm or perhaps suffer an eating disorder, particularly if they are called names about their weight or appearance.

There are usually quite a lot of pointers that someone is being bullied and if you see or hear any of them you're in a good position to help.

How to tell if someone is being bullied

• Is anyone in your class taking a lot of time off, getting to school late, trying to avoid being in situations like the toilets or changing rooms?
• Do you hear someone calling them names, not loudly, but so that they will overhear?
• Are rumours being spread about them?
• Are they being left out of things when partners are chosen in class?
• Are they spending break and lunchtime on their own?
• Are people fixing up nice things to do out of school and leaving them out?
• Are they getting nasty phone texts and abuse on the internet or by instant messaging?

If so then you already know someone who is being bullied.

You might be afraid that if you do something about it, the bully might pick on you next but there are lots of things you can do to help.

What you should do to help

• Tell a teacher
• Go with the person being bullied and back up what they say to the teacher
• Tell the person being bullied that you'll help them to tell their parents
• Tell your parents what's happening and ask them to have a quiet word with your head of year
• Agree with your friends that you will all make it clear to the person doing the bullying that you don't like what they're doing
• Keep a diary of what you see going on so that you can give a teacher a reliable account of what has been happening

If you tell a teacher what has happened then the bully shouldn't find out that you've done that. The teacher should be able to quietly alert other teachers and keep an eye on the situation so that the bully is caught red handed and has only themselves to blame.

If you see someone being bullied they're probably very upset so make sure they know that you and your friends don't like what is going on and ask them to join your group.

Bullying can make people feel really upset and depressed

Here is what some pupils told us in just one week:
"She has taken all my friends away and I go home at night and I'm depressed and cry" - girl aged 13

"One time I wouldn't eat because of people calling me 'fat'" - boy aged 14

"Mondays were worst because I had to face the bully again and I soon got so worried it made me ill" - teenage girl

"I feel lonely and I want some advice about how to feel better about myself, going to school" - girl aged 15

"I feel like killing myself, it's that bad. I will probably end up in hospital, I have no friends and if I don't get help now I will end up a mess." - girl aged 14

"Other kids trip me up and call me names. It got so bad once that I ran away from school" - boy aged 12

"They stir things up so people don't want to be my friend. I'm depressed, annoyed, stressed and keep breaking down in tears. I feel like I'm about to fall apart" - boy aged 13

"I pray to make the bullies better people but it really upsets me because none of my friends stick up for me. They just sit there and laugh - teenage girl

You're a bully if you do any of these things to someone else:

• You call them names
• You make up stories to get them into trouble
• You tell other people not to be friends with them
• You make remarks about their culture, religion or colour
• You make remarks about their disability or medical condition
• You leave them out when you're choosing a games team
• You take away their possessions or demand money from them
• You hide their books or bag
• You send them nasty text messages or make silent calls to their phone
• You make threats about nasty things that will happen to them
• You make remarks about them liking other boys or other girls. This is called homophobic bullying
• You spread rumours about them
• You take their friends away leaving them on their own
• You hit them, kick them, trip them up or push them around
• You make remarks about their looks or weight
• You don't choose them to be your partner in class
• You tell them you're busy and then go off to enjoy yourself with other people
• You damage their property
• You make jokes about them when you can see they're upset
• You indulge in horseplay when you know they are not enjoying it
• You're going along with the crowd who are doing any of these thing

Risks you run if you bully someone else.

You run quite a few risks if you bully someone else. You could get a warning, detention, temporary or permanent exclusion (expulsion). A violent, one-off incident harming another pupil could be grounds for expulsion.

If an incident involves violence, text phone, internet abuse or demands for money then the victim and their parents should, and probably will, make a complaint to the police.

If you are over the age of criminal responsibility, which is 10 in England and Wales, you could be charged with assault or harassment. Even if the case doesn't go to court but results in a caution that could still have a serious effect on your future.
If you bully someone out of school the council or police could apply for an anti-social behaviour order (ASBO).

Bullies think that if they use false names on the internet they can get away with it but they can't. See our internet section for information about that.

Some young people have been so upset they've killed themselvesThere have been many cases where teenagers have killed themselves due to bullying and no doubt the bullies never thought this would be the consequence.

Bullying UK gets hundreds of emails a month and a surprising proportion are from secondary school pupils who say they are suicidal now or have been in the past. Some have been cutting themselves due to their distress. Others are receiving psychiatric and psychological help. Many of them are too frightened to go to school and some have been removed from school by their parents.

We also get emails from pupils suffering from eating disorders because they have been called fat when they are perfectly normal, and others from pupils with Aspergers syndrome who are teased because their condition makes it difficult to relate to other people.

Bullies also target those who are more clever, more popular and better looking than they are as well as those who stand out in any way perhaps because they wear spectacles, have red hair, dyslexia, diabetes or are just quiet and pleasant.

If you're bullying someone else do you really want to be responsible for another person having a mental breakdown and suffering unhappiness that can last a lifetime.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Click the image below and click the "Expansion arrow" to read Ben's Story full screen or click here to view a PDF

Dear Liz,
There are a couple of bullies in my school who are bullying another boy. I feel very sorry for him. He doesn't tell anyone. They steal his money and make him cry. Once they got his glasses and smashed them and threw them in the toilet. Is there anything I can do to put a stop to this. I don't want to get on the bullies bad side either.
Claire

Hello Claire,
It's kind of you to want to help this boy, he must be terribly upset. Could you be his friend to start with, it sounds as though he needs one?

Would you be able to tell his mum what has been happening because she needs to go into school about it? If you could discreetly tell a teacher that would be a good idea but don't get into difficulty with the bullies yourself.

What about going to the school office to borrow some sellotape or a pen and then quietly mentioning it to the school secretary?

Liz

Dear Liz,
A few years ago I was diagnosed with diabetes. Most of my friends are all right about it but some of them still take the mick. It can be upsetting, what can I do about it?
Peter

Hello Peter,
It must be hard when people make fun over something which you can't help. If this is unpleasant bullying you should tell your form teacher but if it is someone having a bit of fun perhaps you could sort it out yourself.

I think there might be some mileage to be had about your heroism in having to test your blood every day. You could always say you'll give them a demo of pricking your finger to get blood out of it. My guess is that they'd suddenly find they had somewhere else they needed to be - urgently!

If you have health and personal education classes, perhaps you or your parents could have a word with the teacher and a couple of sessions could be devoted to things like eczema, diabetes and asthma and how people control them. My guess is that half the class has got an inhaler stuffed away in a bag and once people understand more about conditions like these they're less likely to make fun of them.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz,
I'm 9 and at primary school. When I'm playing football I get tripped up and they are always pushing me around and taking my dinner money. I often tell teachers about it because I've had a few injuries.
Robert

Hello Robert,
I think you need to have some tactics to avoid problems. Stick to areas of school which you know are patrolled by staff because bullies are less likely to strike if there are a lot of people around.

I know it's difficult if you like playing football but that will also mean they won't have access to your coat and dinner money. This is really a short term measure because their behaviour isn't right.

Ask your mum or dad to write to your head teacher to outline what's been going on. Perhaps they could suggest that supervision is stepped up in the playground and that dinner money is handed in at the beginning of the day to be kept in a safe place.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz,
I'm 14 in March and I'm being bullied constantly. I've had people hitting me and yesterday I had to go to hospital because I thought I had a broken finger. Please help me. I'm sick to death and sometimes I feel like killing myself. I wish I was dead. I have been to the doctor.
Mike.

Hello Mike,
I can see that things are really bad for you, but killing yourself isn't the answer. Bullying Online can help you to get things sorted out, it may take time, but it can be done.

I'm glad you've been to see the doctor because you must be very down about what's going on. Is it possible for one of your parents to email Bullying Online because you'll need their help to sort this out? It can be hard to tackle the school but we can help your parents to do that.

This is not something you can sort out on your own because it's gone too far for that. Your parents need to contact your head teacher to tell them how unhappy you are and to get the bullying stopped. If they've already done this but it hasn't worked there are other avenues they can try like making a complaint to the governors and the local council.

As you've been assaulted and had to go to hospital your parents should think about calling the police in, particularly if there were any independent witnesses to what happened when you got hurt.

If you feel life isn't worth living please go back to see your doctor to explain how you feel. If you want to talk things through with someone on the phone you can call the Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90.
Liz

Dear Liz,
There's a lot of fighting on my school bus and there's an older boy who keeps calling me names and having a go at me. My mum says she can't keep leaving work early to pick me up but I'm afraid what might happen. I live quite a way from the bus stop and I keep thinking the bullies can get me on the way home too.
Andrew

Hello Andrew,
Schools can take action over bullying on the school bus. Your parents need to write to the head teacher about this problem.

In 2004 the government said that schools could take action on the journey to and from school so your parents could mention this link to the school if they are not aware of it Here

Try to sit near the driver or near other passengers if this is an ordinary bus. If this is a school bus provided by the council then your parents could make a complaint to the transport division and ask if the bully could have his pass withdrawn for a short time until he gets the message.

Your parents could also speak to the bus firm because if there's trouble and bad behaviour on the bus then the bus firm might be pleased to have an excuse to complain to the school. That would mean nobody would know you complained and a general telling off might curb the bully.

Look after your personal safety when you get off the bus. If it's dark then stick to well lit areas. Your parents could ask the police where they could get a personal attack alarm if that would make you feel safer. If you feel unsafe then go to a shop and ask them if you can wait there while you phone your parents to collect you.

If the worst happens and you are assaulted by one of the bullies then tell your parents who should report it to the police. Many offices, shops and streets are covered by CCTV so the bullies could be caught on film.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz,
I go to a school with not many pupils from different backgrounds so I stand out. I'm often called names, jokes are told about me and I'm told to go back to where I came from but this is my home and I was born here. My family don't know what's being said to me and I don't want to upset them by telling them. They don't speak English very well and they might not be able to sort it out for me.
Jasbinder

Hello Jasbinder,
If these ignorant people are making nasty remarks about your background, colour and culture then this is racism. Try having a word with your class teacher at a time he or she isn't busy. Perhaps you could tell other people you've forgotten to hand in your homework and have to stay behind to finish it.

If that doesn't work then your parents need to write to the head to explain the background and to ask for the name calling and jokes to be stopped. They should ask the head to record their complaint and to let them know in writing how he is dealing with it.

If your parents find writing a letter difficult there may be someone in your community who would be able to help them. Many towns also have Race Equality Councils and those are also places where they can find help.

Racism is serious and needs to be tackled. Many police forces now have special sections specifically to deal with this problem and if your parents need to contact them they should find someone understanding. Many forces also have police-school liaison officers who can be very useful in warning the bullies off.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz,
I've been having trouble with girls in my class in Year 6 for a long time and I'm worried it's going to get worse when we all move up to secondary school. I'm also afraid I'm going to get new bullies on to me too.
Marie

Hello Marie,
It's natural to be worried and nervous about changing school because it can seem like a big step but your mum and dad can help you out with this.

They can contact the head of the first year at your new school in the term before you start there and explain your concerns. Most schools don't want you to have a bad start to your new school life so they may be happy to make sure that you're not in the same form as the bullies.

When term begins it may seem strange at first but everyone else will be new too. Try to invite as many new people home as you can so that you get the chance to make lots of new friends. Join a few clubs and societies if you can too because that's another way of making friends.

Bullies usually target people they know so it would be unlucky for you to be bullied by someone older who was a stranger but if you're worried about this then stay in busy areas of school where there are plenty of other people.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz,
I'm 14 and I can't face school any more. I want to move to a new one because it can't be any worse than this. I'm always on my own at break and I've got nobody to go around with. I've fallen out with my friends and they're going around with someone who used to bully me.
Amarjit

Hello Amarjit
I can understand why you're so unhappy but there may be ways this can be sorted out.

Moving to a new school isn't all that easy because the best ones are usually full and you may not get a place. You might end up at a less popular school which is further away from where you live and it can be hard to settle in when everyone else already has friends. It's also possible the bullies will have friends at the new school too.

These people who used to be your friends probably still like you in the same way, but they could be worried that if they show they still like you that they'll get bullied in the same way.

One thing you could do is have a word with each of them individually, at a time when nobody else is around, and just sound them out. You could try to get them into conversation about something like what they did at the weekend and then just say that you used to be friends with them and you're not sure why that changed.

To have friends you also need to be a friend and you can do that by trying to be open and friendly with people and asking how they are. This isn't always easy because sometimes the people you are nice to aren't nice back, but if you just ask someone if they had a nice weekend then it gives them the chance to say something back and then you can try to continue the conversation.

People love talking about themselves so in time you will find people who like doing that because you'll come across as a good listener and then people will enjoy your company and you'll find you have the same interests as some of them which is the first step towards genuine friendship.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz
My grades at school have gone right down and I'm bunking off when my mum's at work because I can't face all the lessons I have with the bullies. I'm being called names about my weight and I have nobody to go around with at break. When I sit down with my packed lunch the others get up and move away. I'm taking so much time off that my mum is going to find out soon. I've told my head of year and she spoke to them but they're still doing it. This is making me feel very depressed and I've self harmed a few times.
Charlie

Hello Charlie,
I can understand why you don't want to go to school but if you take time off then you're damaging your chances of doing well in exams and that might affect your future.

Your mum needs to know what's going on so that she can help to get this sorted out. Try to find a time when she isn't busy to tell her or if you can't do that have a word with a grandparent or another member of your family or close friend and ask them to help you explain what's going on.

As you've already told your head of year then your mum needs to write to the head teacher explaining what's been going on and asking what strategy he/she can introduce to deal with the problem.

Bullying can make you feel very upset and depressed so if you feel like that see if your mum thinks you need to see your doctor. Please don't try to lose weight just because the bullies are calling you names. Only your doctor should decide if you need to do that, you could make yourself ill if you diet without medical supervision. Your doctor might be prepared to write a letter to the school if the stress from bullying is making you ill.

Self harming is very dangerous and can easily go wrong. Please talk your feelings over with your doctor because he/she will be able to help you.

Keep a diary of who does and says what because that can be useful for the school to see what's going on.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz,
There's a website everyone at school knows about where people have been posting insulting messages about me giving my name and also my school and the year I'm in. Lots of vile and untrue things have been said about me and I don't know what to do. My mum wants to get the police involved but I'm afraid it will make things worse. I don't know who is behind it or how to complain and get the postings removed.
David

Hello David,
I can understand why you're so upset about this, Bullying UK has closed down several of these unpleasant websites inviting others to post abuse.

Although this board has been set up by people who live in your area, it is hosted abroad. If you go to the 'help' menu on the board it should give you information about what to do if you have a complaint.

Ask your parents to send an email to the contact address explaining that abusive remarks are being made about you and that these almost certainly contravene the terms and conditions the message board owner signed when he took up the service.

Your parents should ask if all abusive messages about you and anyone else can be removed. They can explain that if there are a number of them they may amount to harassment under UK law and that they will be making a complaint to the police if they are not removed.

If your parents don't get a favourable response they can go to a website called www.geektools.com, to the section called 'who is' and then type in the name of the website ie. www.anyboard.com and one click on the button will tell them the name and address of the site's registered owner. They can then report that to the police.

I'd also suggest that your parents alert your head teacher to this problem as you are probably not the only person being targeted in this way. If people are using school computers to upload this abuse then the school should be able to halt their internet use.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Dear Liz
I'm aged 14 and I'm not getting bullied at school but I get threats from an older girl who goes to my school and who lives in my street. We used to be really friendly but we fell out. I get nasty calls on my phone and takeaways and taxis sent to our house. I know she and her friends are behind it because sometimes she's said things in the text messages that only she would know. Do you think the school will do anything about her if my mum complains?
Sarah

Hello Sarah
Schools don't usually do anything about bullying off the premises, that's because a High Court case a few years ago said they didn't have to, so although this girl goes to your school it's unlikely that the head teacher will want to get involved.

The police are the best people to help here. If you get any more offensive or threatening texts don't reply to them but save them and ask your parents to contact the police. Sending these sorts of messages can be two types of offence. They might contravene telecommunications law and if this is part of a campaign of problems the calls could also amount to harassment.

If your parents take your phone to the police they can find out from your mobile phone firm where the messages came from. It can be time consuming for the police to do this but if there are a lot of messages then it's worth asking them to put a stop to it. Another way to stop the problem is for you to change your mobile phone SIM card.
Liz

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Don't let them, they have the problem, not you, tell someone and put a stop to it. You are letting them do what they want if you stay silent so don't. Put on a brave face and if at all possible walk away from these situations and if not look for a nearby adult and attract their attention.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Show the bullies that there is a good side to you. I changed through my experiences. While I was being bullied, I became shy and afraid, I even missed school.

But then I realised that I wasn't the bad person in this, they were. I went through counselling and eventually built up my hopes, focusing on what my strengths and weaknesses were and what I needed to change. This helped me tremendously and I changed.

In some ways the bullying helped me, it made me see that I had strengths that I didn't even know about, all you need to do is find those strengths inside yourself. The ex-bullies and I are now really good friends and everything has worked out. Don't resort to violence, whatever you do. Don't retaliate. Let the bullies know that you will not drop to their level.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Luckily I had made good notes throughout this time and I came through getting the highest results in the year.

I moved to another sixth form and I have not experienced anything like it since. Don't let anyone tell you that once you have been a victim to bullies you will always be. You won't.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Nowadays I have realised that I am a good person, with a lot of good to do in the world - just remember that to create and bring happiness to others brings happiness to yourself. It's easy to want to curl up and die.

It may be difficult, but be friendly and open and honest with other people than the bullies. The more friends you develop, the more the bullies will leave you alone because people will stick up for you.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Bullying thrives on silence and secrecy. It's difficult but do try to make yourself look brave if something happens, even though you're quaking in your boots. Another thing to bear in mind is that bullying is surprisingly impersonal! A lot of bullies have traumatic personal lives and pick on victims because they want to make themselves feel "big" and often randomly select someone often for the most trivial of reasons. Lastly, it isn't your fault. Stay safe and good luck

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Follow the advice on this website, it really works, look about and you'll find its a lot more easy to make friends than you think, when I was in year 9 and 10 I had no friends and no social life and I even contemplated suicide but by the end of year 11 I had more than 14 good friends and bullying was little of a problem to me.

It still goes on but if you make an effort to make some friends you will find your confidence will grow so much the bullying won't matter.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

If you're ever tempted to take a weapon into school, to settle a score, or to carry one on the street for protection, then DON'T.

Carrying an offensive weapon is a crime and if you are caught with it, even if you have it in your pocket, you are likely to end up in youth court and expelled from school. An offensive weapon isn't just a knife, it could also be something you use in maths at school, like a compass. Using a weapon on someone else is an assault.

But worse, fighting someone using a knife, perhaps to frighten them, can go tragically wrong. People DIE in fights where knives are used.

If you take someone on in this way, perhaps for revenge, because they've upset you, you run the risk of hurting them and getting hurt yourself. If you're feeling angry because someone has treated you badly we can give you lots of practical advice to sort the problem out - safely, so nobody gets hurt.

For more on the real danger of knives:

Murdered schoolboy Luke 'wanted to enjoy life

Internet feud behind school stabbing

Pupil Natashia stabbed in face

Boy knifed in school grounds

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

73% reported complaints from parents and pupils and where teachers took the issue up with the bully's parents 19% found them unpleasant. 38% of teachers taking the survey said they had been assaulted by a pupil.

Peer support was the most used anti-bullying method 21% followed by counselling 17%, circle time 16%, no particular method 13%, restorative justice 8% and no-blame 8%.

43% of teachers thought their school's anti-bullying method was effective but 68% said that it didn't cover cyber bullying like abuse on the internet, by text and camera phone.

Were teachers confident about tackling bullying?

Only 40% of teachers were confident they had all the skills they needed to tackle bullying while 82% thought that trainee teachers should get more advice on tackling the problem and 78% thought there should be more in-school training. 85% thought that lunch supervisors and ancillary staff should have more training.

Only 46% of teachers said their schools took part in Anti-Bullying Week 2005.

A worrying 53% said they were not made aware of new anti-bullying advice or initiatives by the government while 22% were made aware by their headteacher and 24% through staff training days.

If you need help from Bullying UK email us here

Cyber bullying was an issue for 7% of young people who reported suffering internet abuse, receiving abusive emails or instant messaging and phone bullying by text message.

Bullying on the walk to and from school upset 4% and problems on the bus affected 2%.

Homophobic bullying victims said that more than 28% of them had suffered violent attacks and where racist bullying had occurred 43% of pupils had suffered violence.

Where bullying happened

Most bullying happened in the playground 30%, followed by the classroom 25%, corridors 21%, lunch queue 14% and toilets 7%

The distress caused by bullying was very high with 76% of children saying they were mentally hurt, 49% felt very upset and 30% said they were suicidal.

A large number of bullied children 65% said they were sometimes afraid to go to school while 21% of those who said they had taken time off school had done so on five or more occasions.

Most children, 74%, reported bullying to a parent/carer or teacher and 48% said they had told their teacher more than five times that they were being bullied. Where bullying was reported to a teacher in 55% of cases it did not stop and 60% of pupils did not feel their complaint was taken seriously. In 31% of the cases nothing happened to the bully.

Only 45% of children in England and Wales said they took part in Anti-Bullying Week 2005. This was held in November in England and in October in Wales. In England the figure was 48%.

What sort of anti-bullying policy did schools have?

51% of pupils said their school had an anti-bullying policy but only 23% knew what type.

Counselling was considered to be the most effective anti-bullying method at 53% followed by peer support 51%, restorative justice 50%, circle time 45%, mediation 40% and no-blame 34%.

Only 30% of children had been bullied outside school and 20% admitted to being a bully but of those 43% said they had not been punished.

A staggering 85% had seen someone else being bullied and 82% said they had tried to help. More than 90% of pupils claimed to feel upset, angry or scared when they saw someone being bullied and 61% of pupils were sometimes afraid to leave their home.

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More than 71% of parents said their child had been physically hurt by a bully and 30% of those needed to see a doctor. Parents said that more than 40% of racist bullying involved violent attacks.

More than 26% of parents said their bullied children had special needs and of those, 51% were statemented or receiving extra help.

A total of 60% said their children had taken time off school due to bullying. 65% of parents had kept their child at home for safety reasons and 63% of those children had missed more than five days at school.

72% of parents were unaware that they could be prosecuted for keeping their child at home as an unauthorised absence.

Were complaints taken seriously?

Only 56% of parents who complained to the school felt their concerns were taken seriously and 74% of parents felt that measures taken by the school didn't work with 83% saying there were further instances of bullying after a complaint.

33% of parents whose child had been bullied were worried their child might be suicidal and 32% sought help from a doctor or health visitor with 84% finding the doctor helpful.

Just 17% of parents had tried to get a copy of their child's school record but 48% of those parents had difficulty.

More than 26% of parents didn't know if their child's school had an anti-bullying policy.

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78% of the adults had been bullied at school more than five times.

There are clearly long term effects on school bullying victims when 20% reported loss of confidence after their ordeal ended, 13% said it affected relationships, and 7% said it affected their job prospects. 9% said they had been suicidal and 8% said they had received medical treatment for mental health problems.

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Bullying UK surveyed 8,574 children, parents, teachers and adults in the first six months of 2006 in the largest ever investigation into school bullying in the UK. The survey was widely publicised on national TV, radio and in newspapers as well as in young people's magazines and on youth, charity, police and council websites.

Scandalous situation

"We reply to thousands of emails a year so we knew the problem was a big one, but even so we were shocked by what we found out," said director Liz Carnell. "This is a scandalous situation and it needs tough measures to sort it out.

"If assaults were happening in the workplace the attackers would be prosecuted but in many cases the bullies are getting off scot-free without any punishment at all," she said.

The charity believes there should be urgent research to find out why so many children are being bullied repeatedly, despite their parents making numerous complaints to schools.

"There have never been so many trendy methods of dealing with school bullying but the results of our survey are shocking and it's time to find out which methods work and ditch the rest," said Liz Carnell.

"Parents will be shocked to learn that bullying is big business but that none of the anti-bullying methods being used in schools have been evaluated in independent long term trials."

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