Internet safety advice for parents

If your teenage son or daughter has a computer in their bedroom, they are almost certainly meeting strangers online, in gaming websites, chatrooms and forums. They may also be seeking help from dubious websites over issues like self harm or eating disorders.

You wouldn't invite these people into your home if you met them in the street and neither would your child but internet friendships tend to develop quickly and can be intense, particularly if there are shared interests and the child may be feeling isolated and upset due to losing their friends at school through bullying.

People pretend to be teenagersTalk to your son about chatrooms and ask how he knows that John aged 14 who wants to be his new best friend really is a teenager and not Frank aged 57?

Talk to your daughter about the people she meets in website forums. Does she have emotional worries that you need to talk over with her, is she relying on help from other young people or, more worryingly, from older people who flock to these forums with their amateur and sometimes harmful 'counselling' methods?

Unfortunately, there have been cases where adults have pretended to be teenagers and lured young people into meeting them in dangerous situations. Some of these cases have ended up in court in the UK.

Bullying UK has had experience of young people using the internet who have been persuaded into dangerous situations by adults. This is an offence called 'grooming'.

Internet safety advice

Never give out your real name Never tell anyone where you go to school Only meet someone from a chatroom in a public place with one of your parents or another adult.

Never give out your address or telephone number Never agree to meet anyone from a chatroom on your own Tell an adult if someone makes inappropriate suggestions to you or makes you feel uncomfortable online

Danger signs

If the person tries to insist on having your address or phone number If the person wants you to email them pictures of yourself or use a webcam in a way which makes you feel uncomfortable If the person shares information with you and tells you not to tell anyone else about it If the person wants to meet you and tells you not to let anyone know

If the person emails you pictures which make you feel uncomfortable and which you would not want to show to anyone else If the person wants to keep their chats with you secret If the person tells you that you will get into trouble if you tell an adult what has been going on

Teenagers who have found themselves in risky situations on the internet have told us they are afraid to tell their parents in case their computer is taken away. Explain to them it's vital they tell you about any problems they have come across with adults online because other young people may also be at risk.

All police forces now have hi-tech crime units. Print out any dubious or worrying material and report it.

Contact us on help@bullying.co.uk if you need more help.

Other pages in this sectionBullying policies / Role of the DCSF / Is my child being bullied? / School bus bullies
Contacting the Governors and LEAa / Happy slapping / Internet safety advice for parents / Internet abuse
Is my child a bully? / If your child is bullying others / Do you share blame? / Dealing with an older bully
Teacher bullying / Home schooling / Bullying in sport / Parents' panel - Have your say
Who can help on racism / Parents' survey results / Moving your child to a new school / Pupils' survey results
Taking legal action / Bullying outside school / Independent and private schools / Parents' problem page
Model letters to help your complaint / National Bullying Survey 2006 / Cyber bullying introduction / Dangerous websites
Mobile phone problems / Practical help with racism / Dealing with racism / Internet scams
How does bullying make a child feel? / Dealing with a younger bully / Teachers' survey results / Adults' survey results
Contacting the school / Access to pupil records